Random questions as a way to spark conversation
A while ago I wrote THIS BLOG about the power of asking someone what about them would surprise people to know, and how it can be not just unexpectedly revealing but a great way to spark conversation (check out the blog to see what the magnificent Baroness Tanni Grey-Thompson said when I asked her. Talk about surprising!)
The same can be just as effectively be said about throwing a random question into a chat, whether it’s with someone you already know well, or a person you’ve only recently met. Either way, a perfectly pitched random question can bring to light all sorts of unexpected, fascinating, funny, moving, sometimes challenging (so be prepared for that too) views, thoughts and revelations.
When I’m interviewing someone, I always like to have a couple of these up my sleeve to use if the moment seems right. And whilst they can be a great way to get an insight into an interviewee’s life or opinions in a way that doesn’t involve asking a more direct question, they can equally well provide a stimulating talking point with my lovely fella, or, say, my siblings or friends, who are obviously already very familiar to me and visa versa.
Random questions in my past
I remember in my thirties having a book of random questions - it was called something like Dinner Party Conversation Starters - and enjoying many hilarious and revealing conversations with my friends, over meals that I’m not sure qualified as dinner parties, but were all the more thoroughly enjoyed as a result of lobbing the suggested questions at each other nonetheless.
In more recent years I was given the John Lewis version of that little book. Called So… it’s a tub containing 80 “entertaining talking points to liven up any occasion”, each on a little stick (see pic below), which I’ve dipped into on many get-together occasions with friends and family, probably most memorably when I took it away on a holiday with Jeremy. Eating meals together three times a day for more than two weeks is delightful but can sometimes get a little challenging on the conversation-flow front. Dipping into the tub triggered lots of interesting, enjoyable and entertaining conversations, as well as not a few I-never-knew-that-about-you moments.
My well-travelled conversation starter
Without plagiarising John Lewis, who no longer sell So… but do have THIS conversation starter game, here are ten of my favourite random questions:
What song immediately takes you back to a particular moment in your life?
What's the most unusual or adventurous thing you've ever done?
What’s your favourite thing about yourself?
What's your idea of the perfect day?
If you could have any superpower, what would it be and how would you use it?
What is your most treasured possession?
If you could learn any new skill instantly, what would it be?
If you could un-invent one thing, what would it be?
If you had to get a tattoo what would it be and where would you have it?
If you could ask your future self one question what would it be?
It was really hard narrowing that list down to just ten. There are SO many more I could have included. I’d love to know what questions you’d add. Almost as much as I’d love to hear your answer/s to any or all of them! Please do put either, or both, in the comments.
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